This week we are packing up my oldest to move him into college. That whole cliche of the years flying by is said because it’s true! I don’t understand how it’s already time. He’s ready to go. As a parent this is what we strive for and work towards, to help raise a child into an adult who can go off into the world and create their own path without us. I am excited for him, but also feeling sad. We will miss him at home.
My art journey and motherhood have always been intertwined. How can it not be? I got my first solo show in a gallery when I was pregnant with Noah. And after he was born, I remember times when I would put him in the baby bjorn while I would be setting up a tripod to take photos of my work. His little legs and arms waving around while I was trying to set up the painting for the photoshoot.
When we moved to Chicago, he was my constant companion adventuring around the city. I took so many photos when he and his sister were tiny and we were living in the city. It was a way to keep creative while mothering. And when he was probably somewhere between two and three years old, he already knew what caught my eye. He would see something broken or rusted in the urbanscape as we’d be on our way to the playground and tug my arm and point and say, “Mama, look, take a picture of broken!”
He came to all my shows starting when he was baby. I remember when this photo was taken, he was probably 2 years old and we went to a show I had work in, in Chicago. We entered the space and he sped around the room. I didn’t think he was paying attention to what was on the walls. But then he stopped in front of my work and pointed and said “mama”. Then ran off. I was surprised that he knew! When he got older, he was in charge of keeping his younger sister in line at events. They entertained each other. For the most part.
My priorities for the past 18 years were always first my family, then my art, and then everything else got the scraps. Honestly after family, and then art, I didn’t have much left. ha! In order to make it all work though, I brought my kids into my creative life and vice versa. They even have appeared in my artwork, see first photo! I didn’t always do it perfectly. But that was always my goal. I hope they learned determination and dedication to one’s creative voice.
This kid, now 18 and heading out. Time flies.
Thankfully, I still have Grace at home. My nest isn’t empty yet.