Many years ago we took the kids up to northern Baltimore County to visit the sunflower fields when they were in bloom, take pics among the sunny giants, and of course, gather photo references for paintings. We did all that, but then I never made the paintings. I finally did one!
Why did it take me so long? Not sure. Busy, I guess. As with everything in life, we get pushed an pulled by the things we need to do and things we want to do. In my art practice I also get pushed and pulled by the different things that interest me. To be honest, sometimes when I look at other artist’s bodies of work and there’s a definite look and style, I feel a little alien like- um, well, that’s not the right word, but I can’t think of what captures that feeling of thinking that I’m doing it wrong because I switch around from my earthy encaustic mixed media work, to landcapes in oil, to my outdoor nature installations. I know my work has my voice and style. That’s not what I’m worried about. I’ve been creating for so long, that it’s just inherently there. It’s not even a thought that crosses my mind.
Except when I do my landscapes. Because they are often bright and colorful. Am I saying that I am not a bright and colorful person then? Ha! Maybe. I’m not trying to get a message across other than I saw this and I loved it enough to take a picture and attempt to paint it. Honestly that’s how I am with my mixed media too since I use my photos as transfers or collage…so what’s the deal with internal angst??
And honestly, who cares?
I make things that move me. Period.
I saw this field of bright yellow and was mesmerized. And this week I took a canvas, took out my oils, my palette knife and brushes and created this painting. My favorite part of the painting is the bottom green.
Back to my angst. While I was painting this this week I was thinking that maybe I should create two different Instagram accounts. One with my regular encaustic mixed media work and the other with my landscapes so the back and forth is not jarring. Does anyone really care though? Since I have started curating a bit recently with the curatorial collective gallery I’m in and also with helping with a new retail shop in my town, I am often looking at artist’s instagrams and then their websites if something catches my eye and when you see a cohesive body of work it makes it easy to understand what that artist is about and what they do. I guess this is why I have been thinking about it more.
The interesting thing though is that since I am also an artist and know that we are often multidimensional then I notice the different bodies of work, take note, but make no judgement call and just look at the work. Maybe that’s what other people do and all this thinking is for nothing.
The hard thing about being an artist is that push and pull between wanting to be seen and not wanting to be seen. Or maybe it’s jsut wanting to be seen but not wanting judgment and that’s just not reality. hmmm. Thoughts I ponder when I all I want to do is make stuff.
“Artists are people driven by the tension between the desire to communicate and the desire to hide.” – D.W. Winnicott